Apologies to all the faithful followers of my blog - two at the last count - who may have wondered why there have been no posts since December 2014. One reason was that most of my fading energy over the last two years went into my translation of Liverotto Uffreducci*; the other that I became tired of ineffectually brandishing my pen like a downmarket Lear and asking the winds to blow and crack their cheeks at the follies of ingrateful man.
However, having received many Christmas newsletters from friends detailing the interesting things they've been getting up to over the last twelve months I felt it would be churlish not to respond with a brief account of how Pat and I spent 2016.
I went to the UK three times: in April during Quinn's Easter holidays, in early August to bring Quinn over for three weeks' holiday, and in September for Matthew's fiftieth birthday party. As usual, I managed to lose something. In April I left my jacket and wallet at Matthew and Charlie's and Matthew had to make a trip to Candy's the following day to bring them back. In September I excelled myself by managing to lose my passport at Matthew's party. Fortunately, a friend found it in his car and I was able to pick it up the following day. James and his son Ollie came over from Australia for the party. His daughter, Ruby, who is on a French exchange, was also there as was Matthew's son, Josh. As Candy and Quinn were also at the party I was able to spend the evening with all four of my grandchildren. James and Ollie came over to spend a few days with us before heading back to Australia.
Although it was late September it was still warm enough for them to go swimming in the Adriatic. Candy came over for the last week of August to take Quinn home. He had a few riding lessons while he was here, but the undoubted highlight was the tree-walk at Ripatransone.
Pat went to visit Sophy and Adam in Dubai in March and Candy and Quinn twice: once in October and again in late November.
In July, together with seven English friends who live, or have holiday homes here, we helped run a week's English course for a dozen of the local children. The kids were great and we all had a good time. Whether they learned much is another matter! As always we've spent many an enjoyable evening with our friends who have holiday homes here although sadly, unlike last year when my old university friend, Mike, and my friend and former colleague, Chris, stayed with us, we haven't had any friends over from the UK. An English friend, Sue, who like us lives permanently in Montefalcone will be sharing Christmas lunch with us. Sophy and Adam arrive on the 28th ready for Pat's seventieth birthday celebrations, followed by Candy, Quinn, Pat's sister Deborah, and our friends Tony and Shona on the 29th.
In December, thanks to a very generous contribution at Christmas from Sophy and Adam, I bought an Apple Watch. Most purchasers are attracted by its fitness apps; I was interested in its enabling me to avoid pulling out my phone in situations - walking the dogs, shopping etc - where I'm likely to drop it. So I have my shopping list on my wrist, can control the music I listen to while walking the dogs from my wrist, and can set timers which vibrate on my wrist when I'm cooking: my increasing deafness means I rarely hear the inbuilt timer on the cooker. I can also send Pat a message from the watch asking her to put the kettle on when I'm about to return with the dogs from their afternoon walk. It also notifies me about major events and, on those rare occasions when they send one, about messages from friends or family. So I would recommend a smart watch to any of you who find advancing age brings advancing clumsiness. We also replaced the car this year. It was beginning to show its age, costing us almost €2,000 last year to have the clutch replaced. Although it's still a Subaru Forester, unlike its predecessor it has an automatic gearbox which took me some considerable time to get used to as, unlike Pat, I'd never driven an automatic before. I find it better than a manual for negotiating hairpin bends when going up hill as there's no danger of stalling, worse when going downhill as you can't control the speed via the gearbox (well you can if you select manual drive, but that's a step too far at present).
That's the good stuff; now for the bad. To begin with the trivial: in January I went to my GP to arrange a hearing test at the local hospital. When I arrived in Amandola the hospital seemed strangely deserted. On reaching reception I found a notice saying that the outpatient department was closed for the hospital's patronal festival! I returned in February and was told that the specialist wouldn't be available until March. I returned in March and was told the computer system for was down and it was therefore impossible to book a test. Foolishly, I gave up at that point. To move on to the serious: on June 26th, Brexit - causing our income to depreciate by around 13% thanks to sterling's fall in value against the euro, and probably heralding the collapse of the EU, our one chance of security in an increasingly unstable world; on August 24th, woken up in the night by the house being violently shaken by the earthquake which destroyed Amatrice and other villages, damaged the local hospital and killed 297 people; on 26th October while I was watching television in the evening, Pat was in the U.K., the metal anti-seismic ties in the sitting room began to writhe violently as the house was shaken by another powerful earthquake; on 30th October we had just woken up when an earthquake struck again, this time destroying Castelluccio, our local hospital and Saint Benedict's Basilica in Norcia; November 8th, Trump wins the US presidential election. 2016 is undoubtedly the worst year of my life since the end of the Second World War.
Sadly, 2017 may well be even worse, if not for me personally providing there are no more tremors and the pound stabilises, almost certainly for the world at large. In next year's elections France has a choice between Fillon, an avowed admirer of Thatcher whose economic plans include sacking half a million public sector workers, and Marie Le Pen who wishes to take France out of the EU.; Italy's leading contenders for power are the foul-mouthed Grillo, who wants Italy to ditch the euro, and Salvini, who shares Mussolini and Putin's penchant for being photographed half-naked and wants Italy to leave the EU; then there's Wilders in Holland; a threat to Merkel from the extreme right and so on. Trump will have assumed office and may well renege on NATO, leaving Europe's collection of petty 'sovereign' states to Putin's tender mercies. As Yeats put it so presciently, this Christmas instead of the Prince of Peace we're waiting for the rough beast to slouch towards Bethlehem to be born.
* Also available from the Apple iBook Store. Royalties go to Montefalcone's cultural association, Pro Loco 2000
